It’s OK to be happy

This is my third attempt at writing this. I normally write, think about it for a bit, edit, then publish. But this one is causing me grief (absolutely no pun intended).

It’s Mental Health Awareness Week.

I’ve never been depressed in my life. Pissed-off, yes. Heartbroken, yes. Soul-weary, yes. Fed-up to the back teeth, yes. Menopausal, yes. Never depressed. I don’t know why this is – maybe I’m just lucky, or maybe it’s more accurate to say ‘I’ve never been depressed – yet’.

But that doesn’t mean that depression hasn’t had a profound effect on my life. So for all the people out there who are very very aware of mental health, because they live with someone who suffers from mental ill health – this is for you. This is to tell you that it’s OK –

It’s OK to look after yourself.

It’s OK to do the things you want to do – alone if you have to.

It’s OK to fix your own oxygen mask first.

It’s OK to say shout ‘This is my life too!!’

It’s OK to be pissed off that they’re not OK.

It’s OK to carry on trying to help them even though you don’t know if it’s really helping.

It’s OK to make them go to the doctors even though they don’t think it will help (and you’re not even sure yourself).

It’s OK to set boundaries.

It’s OK to refuse to be dragged down.

It’s OK to be you.

It’s OK to ask for help.

It’s OK to have fun.

It’s OK to tell someone how you feel. If you don’t have someone in your life that you feel you can tell (or even if you do), http://www.mypartnerisdepressed.com is a good place to go.

It’s OK to ask for help.

It’s OK to be happy.

It’s way more than OK – it’s essential.

So, to everyone out there who is, literally, living with depression – this is for you. Be you. Be happy.

I know it’s easier said than done. But I also know that our own mental health depends on it. If this has helped you even just a little bit to know that YOU are important too, please share it with other people who might also need a little bit of help.

If this has resonated with you in any way, please Follow, Share and Like, or email this to a friend.

I always reply to comments from nice people.

7 Comments Add yours

  1. Claudette says:

    I need help with this… I hear that one can ‘choose’ to be happy. Hm…maybe I’ll try it. 😉

    Like

    1. Hi Claudette
      I’m not sure that we get to choose our emotions – but the point of my blog is that if you ARE happy, that’s OK. We shouldn’t allow the people around us to make us feel that we have to pretend that we’re not happy (or joyful, or excited, or any other emotion that we might be feeling). I lived for a long time with someone who suffered from chronic depression – it took me far too long (and some counselling for myself) before I realised that my emotions are valid too. If I’m happy (because, for example, it’s a beautiful day, or the grandaughter is coming to visit), then my feelings are as valid as his. If he struggles to enjoy life, that’s an enormous shame – but it shouldn’t stop me enjoying it. It’s my life too. And actually, me being miserable isn’t going to cure his depression anyway. Better to be honest about how we’re feeling. Does that make sense?
      I wish you all the very best in your quest for happiness.
      MaFaS
      xx

      Like

      1. Claudette says:

        So very well said. ❤

        Like

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